Max Medina: Do you like coffee?
Lorelai Gilmore: Only with my oxygen
We all love coffee. And by all I mean Americans consume 450 million cups of coffee each day (aka about 150 billion cups per year). It gets us through the day. For some of us, the only reason we can get out of bed is to know that the delicious cup of beans is nearby. According to a livescience.com article, 68 percent of coffee drinkers consume their first cup within an hour of waking up.
But there is being a coffee addict and then THERE IS BEING A COFFEE ADDICT. But don’t worry you aren’t alone.
“There are two dark, black liquids that run this country,” said Robert Thompson, director of the Bleier Center for Television and Popular Culture at Syracuse University. “Oil and coffee. Walk down the street in any major city at lunch hour. You just see coffee and cell phones.” Today, the National Coffee Association reports that the number of 18- to 39-year-olds who drink coffee daily jumped almost 10 percent year-over-year in 2011.
We decided to go over some of the signs that it may be time to cut back on the java.
1) Your barista knows you by name. He doesn’t spell your name wrong on the cup. And you know his name… and his mom’s.
2) You get a terrible headache if you don’t get a cup of coffee within an hour of waking up. Like you-want-to-hit-someone headache. It will go something like this:
3) When you watch The Little Mermaid, you find it odd that she is not green and white and on a cup.
4) You found the amount of time the cast of Friends spent sitting in a coffee house to be totally normal.
5) Your coffee mug is a precious treasure. It is the ring to your Frodo (or Gollum.)
6) You could actually afford a Celine bag if you didn’t buy those three cups of coffee everyday. According to a recent survey of 1000 American workers by Accounting Principals, half of American workers that buy coffee on a regular basis during the week spent an average of $1092 a year on coffee; that’s over $5 a day.
7) If you don’t drink coffee for a day you literally can’t keep your head up or you have insomnia.
8) You think iced coffee is the new water.
9) You thank the makers of coffee and iced coffee at least once a day.
10) Your hand feels weird when it isn’t holding a mug. You suffer from phantom coffee-mug holding.