I’ve always been a bit of a rebel, and that has followed me into my career as a life coach. If I’m being honest, I actually prefer to work with clients who aren’t happy.
There’s something really powerful about misery and other heavy feelings like anger, resentment, frustration, and resignation. When you’re down in the dumps, you’re typically motivated to not feel that way. In other words: when you hit rock bottom, the only place left to go is up.
People who have the most to gain from a project are often the best to work with because they’re more likely to take risks.
Unhappy people who feel stuck in their lives usually turn out to be some of my most content clients, because they finally admitted how unhappy they were and decided to change it.
A life of mediocrity is more difficult than being unhappy.
It’s often the people who are barely getting by that are more difficult to help.
The people who don’t express much emotion are the ones I’m talking about. When you ask them about their job, they reply with a very blunt, “Eh, it’s OK,” or something like, “It pays decently.”
They don’t quite know what they want yet, and though they say they’ll “get around to it someday,” currently they’re too preoccupied with other things.
They’re not unhappy, but they’re also not content. It seems as if they are oblivious to the fact that they are on a journey. They’re just being driven to one destination after another without giving any thought about where they’re ultimately going or why.
Their lives consist of a never-ending comfort zone, making it impossible for them to work up the courage to take risks. Disrupting the status quo could lead to potential trouble, thus it’s not worth the risk. Sure, things could be better if changes were made, but they could also backfire and become worse.
I can’t help but cringe when I encounter people who are in this position.
If they only knew how much their life could improve by taking risks and pushing themselves outside of their comfort zone.
Use unhappiness and misery as motivation to take action and go after what you really want. Most people’s definition of this includes some variation of passion, fulfillment, and a life well lived.
When you feel neither good nor bad, it’s difficult to find the motivation to pursue your goals.
You can spend years of your life settling, tolerating, and rationalizing, all of which slowly wears down into stagnation.
When you’re content, you put off going after your dreams until tomorrow. But when you’re unhappy, you know that you need to change something today.
The present is the only time you have to pursue greater happiness. If you are not currently miserable but also not happy, then I urge you now to take action.
- It’s okay to be different, go against the grain, and try new things even if it makes you uncomfortable. Being discomfort is part of the course when you’re trying to change something. You can’t get around it, but you can deal with it better if you accept it ahead of time.
- Understand that fear and risk can feel gigantic and petrifying at the moment, but they don’t stick around forever (and there’s a great payoff waiting at the end).
- The biggest mistake you can make is playing it safe for too long and never taking any risks. You’ll only end up regretting all the time you wasted when you could have been chasing your dreams.
What do you think of this? Has it changed your perspective on unhappiness, or struck a chord with you in some way?
I would love to hear your thoughts and opinions in the comments below.